happy thoughts!!

Now I know what it feels like to hyperventilate. I watched the Milan-Schalke match yesterday and when Christian scored, I really hyperventilated. You know how when you experience something for the first time, but still know exactly what it is you're experiencing? That was what it was like. I started out wanting to scream, but because my voice was totally gone, I couldn't. Only a little whistling came out of my throat, and then I suddenly couldn't breathe and my eyes welled up. It was really weird, but nice at the same time. Schalke played a really good match (especially Christian), but Milan were still the better team. I'm not too disappointed about Schalke not going further in the tournament, but it still sucks... I think Ragnick should have put Søren and Ebbe in a lot sooner, because (as Morten Olsen had found out), 5 minutes isn't enough for Søren Larsen to actually score. If he'd had 15 minutes he could maybe have equalised, but we'll never know...

Rasmus went his hacky Chrismas lunch yesterday. He told me that since he's met me he's been to practise two or three times, where he'd usually spend 10-20 hours a week practising. That made me both feel really good about myself, because it's nice that he wants to spend so much time with me instead of practising, but also kinda bad, because he really likes this hacky thing and I don't want to be responsible for him not doing something he likes. He said that it he's wanted to cut back on hacky practise, because if was taking over his life, but this seems a bit extreme...

I stayed home today, again. I once again woke up with no voice and a beginning sinus infection, so I thought it wisest to stay home, since my history with ignoring a beginning sickness is kinda bad. Hopefully I'll be on top on Friday, because I'm going to see Franz Ferdinand in concert! Woot! *dances* *has coughing fit*

Now, reading a little Kuhn for tomorrow.

ETA: I just found out that it's our two month anniversary today! I can't believe it's been that long, already... And it doesn't seem to be ending any time soon. We're only at my place and now he's started to leave his things there. And when I said I hadn't watched "Riget" (Danish TV show) he said he'd make me see it at some point. And then there's the whole "I feel safe when I'm in your arms"-thing, which is just too cute for words.

I really am so grateful that Kathrine made me go to that party at her friend's house. Rasmus makes me feel so good about myself and he's so sweet to me and my sister likes him and...yeah. Life is good :)

So, yes. What's happened. Not much. Turned in my nature assignment today, hopefully it's good. Next assignment to turn in is on Wednesday, this time culture. Hmm... Oh, I texted with Rasmus today and we agreed to meet up on Monday! He has some group work, but "I'll fight to be there!" Aww... :) Last time I saw Rasmus was Thursday morning last week, so by now I'm almost going out of my mind. On day #4 I was at my worst, questioning everything and everyone! Rasmus had told me he had a lot of work (still has), so he hasn't texted me in a while. I asked him if we maybe, if he had the time, we could go see a movie at some point before he turns in his paper (on December 16th). His answer? "Before December 16th!? I should hope so! Not seeing you would be torture!" Gah!! I'll just be over here, melting... If I couldn't have the real thing beside me, at least that message kept me warm all night.

Tomorrow we have our Christmas Lunch dinner (yes.) at Geography. Should be a lot of fun! I promise you *ALL* that I will not try and get wasted, because I am sick and tired of spending all of the following day being, well, sick. I'll just have to come to terms with the fact that I'm both little, a girl and not very used to alchohol in my system (yes, still), so I need, like, half of the alchohol everyone else needs to get drunk. But I am seriously in love with my outfit! I've bought this top in red (it *is* Christmas, after all) and I'll wear it with some long, dark blue jeans and my black, tall boots. Woot! I'm loving this outfit so much, because it both looks kinda glamorous, but still low key. The perfect mix! So tomorrow night will be all about the flirting with my past flirts, I think. Look what you guys missed out on! Ha!

So, as you can see I have lots to do these days and will have for the rest of December (more assignments coming after that culture one), but everything is nice a good and life is wonderful!

:D

I just got an appointment at my doctors to talk about (and get a prescription for) birth control pills. Which is pretty frightening, in a weird and un-frightening way. It's just...different. I never thought I'd come to this point, actually. Four months ago going on the pill was such a foreign thought, but now? Not so much. Birgitte and I bonded about it today, actually. So strange...

And, yes, that was TMI, but I don't care.

This week will consist of me reading all the stuff I never got around to reading last week, going to see Harry Potter (again) on Wednesday, eating at my grandmom's on Thursday and Fridaybar on, well, Friday. Rasmus has got plans all week, so I'm not missing out on anything there. The frightening part is that if he didn't have plans tomorrow night, for example, I'd totally skip reading for the lectures on Wednesday and thereby ruining my plans for getting the upper hand on reading everything in this block. The fact that he's such a huge influence on my decisionmaking is just...frightening.

My iPod (Li'l Blue) is in the house!! Yaaay! It's being updated as we speak!! I'm just so...yaaaaay!!! *dances*

My life is both very confusing and not confusing at all at the same time right now. I just feel like a lot things are happening in my life, which isn't necessarily a bad thing; it just takes up a lot of my time. One of the things is that I've started Block 2 at University, which means that I have two classes, one of which is a new one (Methods, which is the theory and science of, well, science. The philosophy and logic behind it all). The thing is that we have two classes, but they are both divided into two more classes, which means that we basically have four. And that takes up a lot of time for reading and writing assignments. For tomorrow, for example, I have to read something along the lines of 75 pages. And that's only because one of the Methods classes start tomorrow, so we haven't had anything to read yet. It's not that I'm complaining (because I'm really not! I love reading about the morphology of Danish cities - beats wheat and swine any day), it's just a lot to get used to. Again.

Another things that's changed lately is the whole Rasmus-deal. I've really fallen for this guy and that scares the crap out of me. I was reading on Tuesday, but I kept reading the same page over and over again. I told Laura the next day and she told me that she reads a lot better when her boyfriend is in the next room, just because he's there. And that's exactly the way I feel. Rasmus came over on Sunday and needed to read some Philosophy, so we sat together and read our texts. I'd tried to read that very same text earlier, but couldn't. Suddenly I read a page twice as fast as earlier. Rasmus spent the night both Saturday and Sunday (Saturday we ate cake with my sister and some friends, so now he's really been introduced to my sister!), which meant that when he left on Monday morning we'd spent 36 hours together. And since then I've gotten eight text messages. None today. It's not that I don't think he likes me, because he does. It's just that, how hard can it be to send me a, "How was your day, dear?"-message? I'm sitting here silently going nuts *and* ballistic, drowning my non-existing sorrows in 38 pages of Geographical economics, but it's now working. It would really give me peace of mind if he would just text me, already... Another thing that stresses me is that we really behave like we're boyfriend/girlfriend, but none of us have mentioned that part yet. Yes, I know, I said I'd ask him the next time we saw each other, but I'm a chicken, so I didn't. I think that it's a mixture of not really having it down on paper/written a contract/"you belong to me"-kind of thing plus the fact that he hasn't written me today that's throwing me off right now. And it shouldn't, because he's probably just busy reading 100 pages of Nietzsche or Kant or Descartes or something and he'll most likely write me in an hour or three, but by then I've gone to bed and then we're back to square one. I just hope we can find some day this week to get together...

Oh, well. Basically I really am very very happy right now, but the changes are just making my life a bit more unfamiliar and scary. In a good way, I think.

This was just a way for me to explain to you guys why I'm not online that much these days. I hope you're all well and happy and I love you all!

Back from the lovely Deutschland! Every time I visit Berlin I love the city just a little bit more - it's just that wonderful!! I wanna go back already. We did got the absolute most out of the 48 hours we had, we shopped around all of Berlin, visited tourist attractions, ate good food, went drinking and goofed around. One of the others had been there before, but it had been such a long time that he couldn't remember the geography of the city or the language, so I ended up being the tour guide/translator (in spite of it being, what, 5 years since I had German? Long live forum-aufschalke.de!!). Since I went to Berlin with a gay guy and a couple, all three of whom having no trouble talking about sex, and after being with Rasmus, the topic being discussed and used in 75 % of all our conversations ended up being sex in every aspect imaginable. Seriously, I know things now that I didn't think possible! And I have plenty of things to...*cough*...explore. Too bad for Rasmus that I'm sailing in the Red Sea... Anyway! I wanted to buy that Schalke key ring, but I seriously couldn't find any football/sports stored anywhere, so I came home empty handed.

In other news, my *long* vacation-thingy is finally ending. I'm going back to university on Monday after 5 weeks with no classes. Yes, seriously. But I think I'm more ready for what's coming this time than I was 2½ months ago. I'm really looking forward to learning new things (plus city morphology beats agriculture *every time*). And I miss the others like crazy. Just being able to see Kalle, Thomas, Mads, Anders, Birgitte, Asta and the rest in the halls and at the lectures makes everything better.

I miss Rasmus... He said he'd missed me, too. That makes me happy :)